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  • Our Writers:

A Hat

Demoman stayed there. Staring at it.

“Yo Demo, wha-” Scout approached him, holding a BONK can, but was quickly interrupted by Demoman who “shhh-ed” him.

“Quiet now, lad!” he said, turning his face to the thing “Can ya see the bloody thing?”

“What the…” Scout looked hard. The shape started to form. Then it became clear.

“It’s a hat.” Scout said, turning to Demoman, drinking BONK again.

“Yeh, and a lovely hat, lad!” Demoman said, smiling “And I got my sight set on catching it!”

They were staying on Goldrush for the rest of the day. It was a quiet and nice day, actually, the Administrator informed them that it was a “peace” day, so no fighting until 10AM of the next day. Demoman was hiding, crouched behind a box, looking at the hat, and Scout was next to him, drinking his RED BONK can:

“Dude. It’s just a hat!”

“Silence, ye bloody thing!” Demoman then looked back at the hat “When ye old Demo here was a small lad like ye, I couldn’t get a hat for me. And now me chance is here!”

“What if it doesn’t fits on you?”

Demoman turned his head to Scout quickly. An awkward look was on his face.

“What?”

“You know. Fit. On you.” Scout said, looking back at Demoman.

“Lad, are ye drunk? How can a hat not fit on me head?” Demoman laughed, while saying that.

“It didn’t fit on Heavy.”

“Oh yeh.”

“He went so mad that his Bean hat wouldn’t fit that he threw it in Pyro’s direction. Next thing we know, bam, Pyro’s using it.” Scout looked inside his can to see if there was anything left on it.

“Oh ho ho, that Pyro lad’s face was so good!”

“Yeah, he was so happy. You know. I never had a hat too.”

They looked at each other. Scout’s hand gripped around his pistol.

“Oh yes, lad. I never had one, too.”

“Yeah.”

Silence.

“IT’S MINE!”

Scout jumped off the balcony and ran in the hat’s direction. Demoman quickly pulled his sticky launcher and launched a sticky right in the hat. Scout stopped:

“If ye touch that hat, lad, I’ll blew ye up!”

“No way, it’s mine!”

“You’ll get that hat when ye kill me and my booty!”

Demoman jumped from the balcony, running against Scout. They started to fight, and the hat just stood there. On the base, Heavy and Medic were watching the fight:

“Ze know something, Heavy?”

“Yes, doktor?”

“It’s just a hat.”

“Yes doktor. A good and fashioned hat.”

They looked at each other and raised their guns. All over a hat.

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2 Responses

  1. That’s how hats NEED to be obtained.
    Pure bloodlust. Not this crappy drop/craft system.

  2. It was great, I loved it.

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