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I bought a new car

Very recently I lost something that was really close to me. Her name was The Beast. She was 14 years old and was with me since I moved to America. She’s been with me through girlfriends, job interviews, car parking lot raves, and learning how to drive. Every memory I have of her is amazing. But sadly her engine finally gave out and she drove her last few feet with me behind the wheel.

After a few days of mourning I finally started looking for a new Vehicle so I can get to places I needed to be like my friends house so I could look at his cocks. They’re 2 fully grown chickens. He says that they’re really dumb and the only reason he keeps them is so he can eat their babies for breakfast.


But enough about cocks. My girlfiends uncle is a mexican. He knows a lot about cars and alot about getting things for cheap. Which was perfect for me, cause I’m like a British mexican, I love free things. I asked him about hooking me up with a car or something and he said he’ll go to an auction and see what he can do. Turns out that there was a really decent Honda Civic 2 door 1994 for 1000 dollars. When he told me I was like. “Ohhhh snaaaap!” and I told him to buy it for me. Turns out it has 240,000 miles on it but it ran really well.

So far all I’ve had to do is get a new water pump cause it totally blew up and poured water all over the place. It was funny actually. It has a spoiler though which I hate because it does nothing due to the fact THAT IT’S A FRONT WHEEL DRIVE CAR! It’s dumb. But yes. That is my story about my new car. I haven’t named her or put coloured duct tape all over her yet so she isn’t so attached to my heart yet.


In case you wanted to mourn my baby I created a memorial video for her.




2 Responses

  1. makes me want to drink alchoholic beverages

  2. […] to give this one to 3com111. He saved the day back in October, when I had asked him to write a new blog post about his recent tragedy, to spark up the blog while I was busy and occupied with other things. Had he not been there to […]

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